Crossfit and Women Athletes

I can't speak for every Crossfit gym across the country, but it seems to me that there is a push for women athletes in Crossfit. Not so much like we need more, although there is a bit of that. But everywhere you look in Crossfit environments, everyone is cheering for the women. I have to say, I'm really proud to be a part of a sport and organization that supports women being strong and athletic.

So many times in athletic competition based settings there are only so many sports where women are 'allowed' to excel, gymnastics for one. But if women excel in a male dominated event, like say NASCAR, they are pretty much written off. Entire leagues created for women's sport are often completely forgotten about. WNBA? Is that a TV station?

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But that's not Crossfit.

Women athletes are talked about with the same idolized awe as the men. There is a specific division where men and women compete side by side on a team.

It's awesome and empowering, even as a woman that would never make it to the Games. I'm so excited to see women seen as athletic and that to be a good thing. For someone to call a woman a 'beast' and mean that she is awesome and strong. And not implying that she's ugly. It's an environment I'm okay with my daughter growing up around.

Every once in a while you'll hear someone call a woman a man. As if only men could be so strong. Men don't have the market cornered on being strong and powerful anymore. Just like women aren't the only people on the planet that can be wimpy and passive. Using anatomy to determine personality and strength is just as insulting as using age or nationality or skin color or any of the many stereotypes that we are working so hard to break down.

It's nice to know that some sports are helping to bring down those walls. And that my kids will be growing up in a world where being strong isn't just a man thing.

Personal Paleo Challenge Day 1: Fighting!

In the last few months, I've gotten really bad about wanting to start a Paleo Challenge and actually doing it. It seems like a really good idea on Sunday. But come Monday morning, I'm still headed toward to my chocolate Rice Chex and sugared flavored coffee creamer.

It's really easy to think about all the things you want to change and all the things you need to do differently. At least it is for me. I can come up with a good plan for what I should be doing in a heartbeat. I'll research it until I could be a professional. But execution is something very different.

I could blame a lot of things, bad habits, lack of willpower, no self-control, tasty tempting cupcakes. Whatever the excuse, it's still just an excuse. It's a matter of me just not doing it.

Today is different. Today, I have a team. The family is getting in on it the plan. And while we aren't doing a Whole 30, the plan is about 90% Paleo, which is more reasonable for us.

For me it's about weight loss. I need a plan that will keep me motivated and something I feel I'm capable of sticking to. It's no good coming up with a great plan, starting, and then realizing it's just too much for me to take on long term. For me to get the best results without getting frustrated, I have to start with a few extras. My big one is peanut butter. I just don't like almond butter. It's not a good substitute for me. And an apple with peanut butter is a staple in my diet. My other big extra is rice. While a grain, it has a weird 'not as bad' thing about it. At least that's what I keep telling myself. And it's better for me to include it while I dump all the other processed things and then worry about it after I'm in a more comfortable place with all the changes.

And really that's the best way to come up with a plan. Some people are the type that can make a big change all at once and not look back. Some people need to do things slowly, building a foundation and working from there.

That time of year...

It's that time of year again. Oh you know what I'm talking about. We've been making the list all year with the tag, I'll do that at the New Year. Whether or not you've written something down, everyone has something that they plan to 'work on'.  I do.

There is something about the New Year that makes me always feel guilt about not making it to where I meant to be. I had lofty goals of health and weight loss last year. I lost 18 pounds last year. Not so shabby really. But when I compare it to what I wanted to do, I feel lacking.

In today's world of social media, it's really easy to feel lacking. After all, no one blogs about the crappy things. Who wants to read that? If I wanted to feel bad, I can manage that on my own. I want to see happy perfect people that I can aim to be like. And as I aim to be like them, I often get stuck thinking about where I'm not.

I don't think about the good things, like how I've lost 18 lbs and kept it off. Or how I've been doing Crossfit (mostly) regularly for almost a year now. I'm stronger and far more confident than where I was last year.

It's easy to forget those parts when I think, why didn't I lose 20 lbs? Why didn't I go to Crossfit more? Why didn't I stick to my healthy eating plan over the holidays?

But my theme to this blog is Own It!

I made my choices. And I'm going to own them.

In addition to that, I'm moving on. It's a new year. All that was last year. There isn't a reason to dwell on it. Remember the good. Forget the bad.

My resolution is to not compare. I will not compare myself to other people. And I will not compare my reality to the imaginary. I resolve to live in the now.

It's been a while

So... yeah. It's not that I don't love you. I just kinda ran out of things to say, that I hadn't already said over and over. It's okay though. I can tell we are the type of friends that can go months without contact and just pick up where we left off like nothing ever happened. It happens a lot to grown-ups, I've discovered.

You get sidetracked. Life gets in the way. Things are busy. There's this family thing. And the next thing you know it's been 4 months.

But I've missed you! We should totally get a cup of coffee sometime. You know when someone else is watching the kids and we have time to talk. ... I can't think of when that might be either. So I guess we can stick to the blog.

Life happens. Schedules change. Stuff gets in the way. It's easy to let fitness and health decisions to lapse first. I know, you should see what I've been eating lately.

A month ago we moved, only about 10 minutes from our 'old' house. So to save money we decided we could totally do it ourselves. It worked a bit like a Crossfit WOD. It looked good on paper. Right before, I panicked. During, I didn't have time to worry about, I had too much to do. Once it was over, it didn't seem so bad. And I was grateful that I had been doing Crossfit, those boxes, couches and mattresses were heavy, but I managed my half. So much so that when our new neighbor asked if we needed any help, while we were carrying a heavy hutch, my husband said, "No, we got it. Thanks!"

Hmmm, Crossfit might be backfiring on me.

But during the few weeks it took to do it ourselves, we didn't have time for Crossfit. By the time it was meal time, we were too tired to cook. In fact, we were just plain ol' wore out. So it was fast food and pizza, which we all know are just gateway foods to cookies, cakes and candy.

So our healthy lifestyle has all fallen apart. No exercise, icky food. It's a mess.

It happens.

It just means we have to get back at it. Life gets in the way of your best laid plans. It doesn't mean you quit. So long as you don't quit. Time to get back at it. Even with the holidays. No reason not to start back today.

Mad Men Tricks

I started watching Mad Men last night. I'm a little late to the game, I know, but there was something I noticed right away that I feel the need to point out.

Ad people are trickesters.

It isn't new knowledge. We all know that commercials and ads are designed to get us to buy the products they are peddling. But the first episode of Mad Men shows exactly how much they can't be trusted. Spoilers ahead if you haven't seen it.

In this episode, smoking had been outed as causing cancer. (Common knowledge now, but in the 60s when 'everyone' smoked, it was ground breaking.) The ad guy and the cigarette company is in a panic because they are about to lose business, and suddenly they aren't allowed to promote smoking as being healthy.

Enter the tricks. How can big tabacco convince the buying public that their product is safe, even if it isn't? They decide to by pass saying it's healthy (because legally they can't) and they decide to play up how naturally it's made. They decide on the slogan, "It's toasted."

It brings to mind breakfast toast or fresh nuts, doesn't it? Both are things most consider healthy.

It makes me realize how much faith I put into advertising. I'm pretty skeptical to start with, but I still fall for the "part of a healthy breakfast" line from time to time. Or the milk and cookies routine. Milk's healthy after all, why not spice it up with a cookie (or 6)? Hmm. And I'm hard pressed to turned down cake with love baked in. Who doesn't want a little bite of love? It'd be down right rude to turn it down.

Luckily, I have DVR and can record any TV I watch and skip right past the ads. But they are starting to crop up other places now. The web is really starting to get a good method to advertising. And it's getting harder to avoid someone trying to convince you their products is the best.

When it comes to food and your health, do your research. Obviously don't trust the people trying to sell you their product, particularly if they are adamant about how healthy it is. Apple farmers don't have to convince you to buy apples. Truly healthy foods don't come in package. They are made by nature.

The only way to know if you are eating right is to learn about your food. The more you know...

I hate running!

My kids get corrected every time they use the word 'hate' when describing things. They obviously don't hate each other. They don't hate school. They might not like each other. And there are certainly times they don't like school. But hate is a word they don't really understand. So I remind them, that they don't hate. They just dislike.

So fine, I dislike running.

I really really really dislike running.

I do it anyway.

If it were up to me, the world would turn just fine without running, but apparently it's good for you.

Meh.

So when a workout comes up that has running in it, I start to negotiate with myself if I really have to go. I mean, I should clean the bathroom. That laundry isn't going to fold itself. And the baby kept me up half the night; I really am too tired.

Hold there. We'll come back to that.

There are so many Crossfit movements I'm not good at... yet. I could list them, but you don't have the time. What's important to note about these movements is there is always a scale down. Pull-ups to using bands with your pull-ups, to jumping pull-ups, to ring rows. Box jumps to smaller boxes, to step ups. Weight can get lighter. Those kinds of things.

You can't scale running. You can go slower. (That's me!) Or you can walk. Walking isn't running. They have their own Olympic event, so it must be true. So when there is a workout that has running. I know I have to run. I still end up walking some, especially if there is a lot of running, but the idea is to run as much as absolutely possible. I wont get better if I slack.

So back to the excuses. Sometimes if I can find a really good one, I'll cling to it. The baby is a sleep. (Never wake a sleeping baby!)

I'll be damned if the next workout doesn't have a longer run... every time.

How do they know?!

And I've used my good excuse, and my rest day, because I didn't own it. So I try not to cherry pick my workouts. Even if it looks horrible and has 200m sprints for time, it's important to stick with it. I can't get better if I don't stick with it.

Not all workouts are going to be my favorites. And if I only do my favorites, I'm never going to get better at the hard stuff. And it will always be the hard stuff.

I suspect there will always be hard stuff. My goal is to make it look easy. When someone tells me, I make a movement look easy, I think that'll be the coolest day ever.

In the meantime, I hate running, but I do it anyway.

Eating Clean

My family eats pretty clean. Some people don't really understand what that means. And it might be partly because it means different things to different people.

In general, it means not processed foods. The edges of the grocery store. Nothing out of a box.

You can add to that, organic. It makes it a bit more complicated. Harder to shop for. And if you aren't following sales, more expensive.

You can add to that Paleo, vegan or some other label. And once again it gets a bit more complicated.

Source

At my house, clean means Paleo or a version of.

Eating Paleo isn't like what the media wants people to think. It isn't a meat based diet. It's very much a veggie based diet but always with a good helping of fat and protein. The easiest (and in my opinion tastiest) source of healthy fat and protein is meat. Yum. But to eat Paleo you have to give up a handful of things that have been proven to be harmful, like grains, specifically gluten but all grains are cut out if you eat Paleo.

I also cut out dairy. Most Paleo types do. Some call themselves Primal instead of Paleo and they keep dairy. Really it's all a matter of semantics. And finding where you fit on the eating clean scale.

For me, it isn't about fitting into a label. It's about getting away from cheap, unhealthy food. It's hard to know these days with media shoving down everyone's throats what is healthy and what isn't. After all, all cereals are "part of a healthy breakfast", never mind their sugar content and the fact that their nutrients are added by chemicals, not nature. Kool-aid has less sugar than soda, don't mind the Red 40 or Yellow 5. Then there is the whole grains vs enriched wheat flour. High fructose corn syrup. Brominated Vegetable Oil. Aspartame. Nitrates.

And yet everyone still wants you to think you can eat their food product and still be healthy. But it's obvious that's just not true.

*sigh* So how do you know what's healthy? What makes a clean food?

My rules of thumb.

1. If it can be sold without a nutrition label. It's clean.
2. If the food will go bad before the end of the week, even if kept in the refrigerator. Then it's probably clean.

The rest should be eaten sparingly or not at all.

I very firmly believe that our country's obesity problem would start to resolve itself if people ate clean. No more boxed food. No more fast food. Learn to cook for yourself. By the time you wait in line at the drive through and get your meal home, you could have cooked a healthy clean meal for your family at home. And there is a lot less waste from all those packages.

When you eat better, you feel better. And you lose weight wether you mean to or not. Bonus.

Leaps and Bounds

It's crazy to think I've only been doing Crossfit for a little over 5 months. When you say 5 months, it doesn't seem like very long at all. But my memories of it makes it seem like I've been working at it forever. I think it has to do with how quickly you improve as a beginner. There are still things I can't do. Pull-ups, double unders, and box jumps to name a few. But I can do all the lift movements and I'm always getting stronger and faster.

I can run 400m without stopping to walk now. Vast improvement over the girl that barely made it 100m without falling over. I have no intentions of becoming a runner. I just don't care for it. But something I do like is rowing.

This post from back in April is about a row I did in March. It's what cemented my desire to blog more (if a bit sporadically). It's about my first 2k row. I fought every moment of that row. And while I don't remember my exact time I know it was over 11 minutes. Almost 12, if I remember right. I was terrified before starting but felt awesome when I was finished.

Jump forward to this past Tuesday. The 2k row came up again. This was the first work-out since that day in March that the WOD was just the row. I was very excited to give it another shot! I finished in 9:38.

I beat my previous record by 2 minutes. 2 freaking minutes in 5 months! That's how Crossfit works. It takes years to become a truly exceptional Crossfit athlete, but no time at all to be confident and capable. I can go into a Crossfit gym anywhere in the country and not feel nervous. I might have to scale still, but in just 5 months I've come far enough that I know I can hold my own.

2 freaking minutes off my 2k row!

Can I Crossfit at Home?

I get asked that a lot now that I talk endlessly about Crossfit. In a nutshell, yes. Sure. Whatever. Anyone can do body weight exercises anywhere (think: sit-ups, push-ups, burpees, ect.). You can even go out and buy some weights and a bar. Go a step further and you can buy a rack. And then get at it. I HIGHLY suggest taking a class or two to learn proper lifting form. You can really get hurt if you don't know what you are doing. But that doesn't mean you can't do it at home.

But honestly, all that said, my answer is no. No, you can't do Crossfit at home. As I've said many times the reason Crossfit works is the people. I'm not talking HQ. They can sit in their offices and come up with whatever marketing ideas they like. I'm talking about the people at the gym you'd be going to. And the people at the gym I go to. If it weren't for them, I wouldn't be interested. Why? Because Crossfit is hard.

It's not peddling a bike that doesn't move, watching the news with subtitles for 30 minutes to an hour.

It's very "You want me to do what?!".

I'm not the kind of person that has the willpower to do hard stuff at home alone. I suspect most people like me aren't. Otherwise we wouldn't be out of shape in the first place. So if you are out of shape and wondering if you can do Crossfit at home. The answer is no. Find a gym. It's worth the cash. And you'll meet some really awesome people.

It's those people that will push you, even if you never talk to them. If you just go and then leave. You'll discover that you work infinitely harder with someone watching than at home alone. But the best part is when they cheer for you.

Note: Not all Crossfit gyms are the same. If you find yourself at a gym and no one is cheering for you, you are at the wrong gym. Luckily, there are a lot of Crossfit affiliates these days. Even if you have to drive 40 minutes out of your way it's worth it.

AMRAP vs For Time

Generally there are two types of Crossfit workout, AMRAP (as many rounds as possible in a given time) or For Time (meaning you are given the amount of rounds and you finished when you finish). I flinch every time I see a For Time WOD (workout of the day).

I've been doing Crossfit for 4 months now. And I'm happy to say, I'm pretty pleased with my progress. I'm not doing the beginner workouts anymore for the most part. There are some movements I just can't do. Pull-ups for one. I can't even get them with a band. It's coming though. I like to think I'll meet my strength going up as my weight goes down. Box jumps is another. I think it's the same problem. As I get lighter my legs will be getting stronger and jumping up will be easier. Then there are double unders. That's just a matter of technique. But that's not really what this blog is meant to be about.

I'm talking about reading the workout and the dread that comes with a For Time WOD.

See, you can scale any workout to fit your level. For Pull-ups, I do ring rows or jumping pull-ups. For box jumps, I do a shorter box. If the listed weight is too heavy, then just go lighter. Every workout can fit every fitness level.

For an AMRAP you are given a specific amount of time to work in. I usually have less rounds finished when time it up than the rest of my class. That doesn't seem to bother me because I know I worked hard. During an AMRAP, I will pick a heavier weight or try for a harder level of a skill I'm not particularly good at. But that's not what I do during a For Time WOD.

A For Time WOD you are given a certain amount of each skill to do and however long it takes it takes. I will scale that workout sometimes too much, because I don't want to end last. There is no shame in being last. I've been last. I've owned last before by just working my ass off just to finish. And if I'm last by only a little bit, my pride is fine. But I'll be damned if I think I'm going to be last by a lot, I'll scale (almost to the point of cheating).

I only cheat myself. I've talked about cheating before and being last. It's something I think about a lot. No one else in my gym thinks twice about me coming in last. No one would ever say anything negative to anyone finishing last. It's not that kind of place. In fact, the person finishing last gets the most support because by then there are people recovered enough to cheer you on.

When it happens to me, I'm embarrassed. I'm just not ready to have that much attention drawn to me. Maybe no one is. I've never asked anyone else.

Where am I going with this? I have no idea. I just needed to get that bit out there. Thanks.

Hurts so Good

I have a rather low pain tolerance. I least I always thought I did. One little headache or tummy cramp and I would run for the Tylenol bottle. If I thought I might kinda get a muscle cramp later, I'd take an Advil to head it off.

Now, I'm becoming an athlete.

If I'm not a little sore at the end of the day, I feel a little cheated. More like, I feel that I cheated.

The last couple weeks have been a whirlwind of busyness. I have no idea really what all was so busy. But I haven't made it to the gym as often as I'd like. I spent many days not feeling sore. It was just plan weird.

Then we found the time to make it back to the gym.

O.M.G.

I hurt like I had never done a squat before in my life.

That's all it had taken was a couple weeks of being distracted to get out of shape. I didn't go back to square one on my ability. But my muscles were pissed that I hadn't bothered to work them regularly. And it hurt. I'm still recovering really.

I like learning these lessons really. It helps hammer home my developing athletic lifestyle. If I really want to be an athlete, I have to work regularly. There's no time off or vacations. It's something I have to find time for multiple times every week.

You don't get something from nothing. If you want something, you have to work for it. And if you try to slack a little, you'll end up paying more than it's worth.

I might have given up in the past. But I'm committed. This isn't just for me. I have a family that needs me to be healthy and strong. I do this for them too.

But who am I kidding. It's summertime and I'm ready to look rocking in a bikini. (Maybe not this year, but damn skippy by next year I'll be set to go.)

Summer Slacker Blues

I love Summer! I've never met anyone that doesn't. Sun is wonderful. And since the invention of A/C the heat is always manageable. But there is something about summer that just makes you want to laze around and forget all the things you are supposed to be doing. Why is that?

So after my family recovered from our summer colds two weeks ago. We were already in the laze around habit. Comfort foods (although kept within a form of reason) and sitting on our rears had taken a pretty big hold. It doesn't take much to slip back into old habits.

Come to find out we aren't the only ones with this affliction. After going back to the gym yesterday (for the first time in a week), it seems quite a few people have been missing.

Have we all started to slip away with the last of the New Year's Resolution hangers on?

Is it just a Summer Slacker thing?

Who knows. But it does seem to have us all in a bit of a funk. A funk with slightly tighter clothes.

I firmly believe that weight loss is mostly related to diet. But exercise can be 100% reflected in mood improvement.

It's just a matter of getting back at it.

This week is shaping up to be a fun one. I don't love all the movements used in Crossfit. I haven't met anyone that does. But everyone has favorites. And so far, the schedule has included mine.

So if you are doing a program that you are starting to find tedious, or you've been running but now it's getting too hot outside and your are having to resort to a treadmill and don't care for it, I suggest Crossfit. It's something different everyday.

If you aren't exercising. You should. It'll change your life.

Becoming an Athlete

It's hard. I'm a big girl. I'd say I'm fat, but people cringe when that word is used. It doesn't make it any less true. But to save your feelings, I'll stick with big.

I'm working on it. But I've been a big girl a really long time. There was a moment in my adult life when I was a size 10. It lasted about a month before I got pregnant. It was the trimmest I'd been since high school, no one was blaming my husband. HA!

Still, my body is rather used to being overweight. I still only ever see myself as overweight. I keep having to tell myself I'm working on it. I am working on it. But dang it takes so much work and it's hard. The exercise is physically hard, but that's not what I'm talking about. I really like the exercise. As you can tell if you've read my blog before, I love Crossfit. But losing weight isn't just about exercise. In fact, it has very little to do with exercise. I think the percentages given are usually 80/20. 80% diet and 20% exercise.  Someone, somewhere probably made that number up. But it's true. If you are eating crap it doesn't matter how much you exercise, you aren't going to be fit.

Which is what I'm trying for. I'm not interested in being skinny. I don't want to look like the girl in the magazine. I want to look like an athlete. More over, I want to be an athlete. I don't aspire to the Olympics. But I'd love to be able to play in a pick-up game of soccer or to run a 5k. I want to be strong and have muscles. And I think that takes more work than just losing weight.

To lose weight fast, I could just restrict my calories. I don't do that. I only watch what I eat. I try to eat clean and work-out 4 times a week. And it's enough. I am losing weight. Slowly. So very slowly. And sometimes it just breaks my heart. Since February, I'm down 14 lbs. I know I've put on a lot of muscle. But when I started I was about 80 lbs up. I have way more fat to lose than I have muscle to put on. The scale isn't adjusting accordingly. And it's disappointing.

I still don't plan to count calories. I'm not out to feel restricted or to start a trend of having to worry about every single bite of food that goes into my mouth, even if it is healthy and good for me. If I cut my calories too much it might make the weight just fall off, but I'll lose muscles too. I don't have enough muscles to lose. And if I cut my calories, I'll lose energy. I have three kids. I need every bit of that energy.

So I'll keep working at it. At my super duper slow pace. It's not a sprint, right? I can't come in last if I'm  the only one in the race. No matter how slow, I'll be the winner in the end. But man alive, it's disappointing some days not to see the scale move in the right direction.

On Being Sick and Losing Weight

I have a summer cold. It's been brewing for a week and is now in full blown snot status. And I have my kids to thank for it. But they seemed to have the lite version because they haven't slowed down a bit. (Or use the quantity of tissues I do.)  I'm missing the days where I could just hide in bed for a day or two and rest to recover. I feel like one full day of sleep is all it would take. But who has time for that?! I'm missing the days where I could just hide in bed for a day or two and rest to recover. I feel like one full day of sleep is all it would take. But who has time for that?! The worst bit for me is that it's kept us out of the gym. I know I talk about it a lot, but I really love my Crossfit gym.

Since I haven't been to the gym in a week, I've had to really look at my diet. My Whole 30 challenge never turned into more than a Half 30. I'm easily distracted and lazy about cooking. So when someone suggests take-out, I'm not one to turn it down. I have been making better choices. Bunless burgers, naked nuggets, those types of things. But I haven't turned down the french fries. They have no redeeming nutritional value, but man alive, they are tasty.

But I've still lost weight. Why? Because Paleo works, even if you fudge it just a little bit. See, it's about cutting out grains first. I could spew about all the science, but I wont. The fact is, I'm not all that solid on the science of it, except that I've read it. It's all there. It makes perfect sense. But you wont truly understand until you cut them out of your diet.

Things that are true for me just because I've cut out grains:

1. I can eat all the fatty protein I want and still lose weight. Yay for steak and bacon!
2. I eat healthy vitamin filled fruits and still lose weight. No counting carbs for me. I've already cut out the big carbs, grains.
3. When I had gestational diabetes, I could keep my blood sugar in check by not eating grains. It was that simple. (The first time I had to use insulin, because I didn't know better.)
4. I don't get bloated.
5. My bathroom situation is nice and smooth because I get my fiber from soft fruits and veggies, instead of rough grains. (TMI?)

So maybe I should stop there. The point is, I have a lot of good things going because I have cut out grains and the only bad thing is that making a sandwich for lunch is out. Sandwiches are so easy. Want to know what else is easy? Meat with some raw veggies and a handful of nuts, a bowl of premixed salad, an apple and some nutbutter (my usual breakfast), a PaleoKit (oh my goodness, so tasty!), leftover steak (does that exist?). There are so many things you can do besides reach for bread. It's like the creative eating copout.

Sorry, I was trying not to get preachy. It's hard when I know it works and I know it would work for everyone.

Double Unders!

I was good at jumping rope when I was little. I could out jump most kids in my class. I never managed most of the really cool tricks. But I had a few that were impressive to the other 10 year olds at the playground. Fast forward 20+ years... well, let's just say it's been a while. It didn't take long to get the skipping down again. Like a bicycle, I suppose.

But Double Unders are a beast of their own. It's a completely different rhythm that even some of the elite at our gym struggle with. It's a matter of speed and timing. And when you miss, those wire speed ropes are not forgiving! It makes it so that you have to really want it to even try.

So I'm not really sure what I was thinking when during my 90 rep single skips, I decided to try a double under. But I got it!

Woo! I totally shouted to everyone that I got my first double under!

And no one heard me. The music was up too loud and they were all busy.

Photo credit: Reba

So I tried again. And I got another! I was so freaking excited.

And tired. I only managed the two.

I totally told everyone at the gym after the work out. And by everyone, I mean everyone! I was even caught in action bragging about my accomplishment.

After I got home, I felt a bit like a nerd about telling everyone. It didn't stop me from Facebooking about it. ... Or blogging about it.

Sometimes, it's the little things that make Crossfit so great. There wasn't one person I told that wasn't excited for me.

It feels good to accomplish something new and difficult. And it's very validating when you see your hard work pay off.

Next time, I'll get 3. ;)

I've never been so glad to finish!

Earlier this week, I had a work-out that was designed to kill me. Alright, I'm exaggerating. But it was crazy tough and chalk full of movements I stink at. Run, dumbbell snatches, toes to bar, and more running. I'm, by far, the slowest runner. I've never done a dumbbell snatch. And I can barely hang on a pull-up bar, much less get my toes to touch it. Every one of those skills are ones I need a lot of work in.

Instead of going in a bit defeated, I was open to practice. After all, no one gets better at anything without practice.

I still dreaded the runs.  I'm not a runner. I hate running. I would like to magically be better at running. I have very little desire to work to run better. But there is no way out of it if I want to get better. So I did it. I did not enjoy it. But I managed.

It was my first time doing dumbbell snatches. Like any newbie, I watched a video about it before going to the gym. I like to be prepared. And I killed it, thank you very much. I really like lifting weight above my head. I don't know what it is, but it is really cool. It was the redeeming part of the work-out for me.

The toes to bar scale down to knee raises for me. It's still plenty hard at my level. And I can't do but more than a few at a time. I could probably do more if it didn't hurt my hands so much. I don't have Crossfit calluses, yet. But after that work-out, I started getting closer. To anyone that isn't a Crossfitter this next bit might sound gross, but Crossfitters will get it. ... Someday I hope to have some calluses. I'll be bragging that day!

Then the big finish was another run. I think my coach hates me.

Okay, so it isn't personal. But I really am the slowest person at our gym. And it's hot. And whine/complain some more. Did I mention I hate running?

But I did it. And I finished Dead Last.

But oh, I was so glad to be finished! I worked hard for every second for that time!

Dead Last

I happens to everyone at some point. It happens to me a lot. My goal in a work-out is to not be last. It seems like a reasonable goal. Most of the time I have to scale to make that happen. Sometimes I have to scale and I still finish last.

Finishing last gets old. But at the same time, I don't particularly mind. After all, it isn't a race. I'm not competing with anyone at the gym. My only competition is myself.

I read this article today: Crossfit 101: Don’t cheat on burpees

I could have written that article. I've actually been thinking about that for days. I was amazed at the coincidence  that someone else was at the exact same place as me when considering scaling. I've been doing Crossfit for just over 3 months now. Going from inactive and pregnant to athlete isn't going to happen in just 3 months. So it's perfectly reasonable to scale. Everyone would agree with that logic.

But at what point does scaling become cheating?

I don't have a clear answer. I only know that if I don't leave everything I have at the gym, I feel like I've cheated.

Sometimes after a work-out if I feel like I could keep going, I'm disappointed. Obviously I didn't work hard enough. I've gotten to where I take it in stride. If that's the case, then I know for sure next time I shouldn't scale quite so much.

Sometimes after a work-out if I feel like I could keep going, I feel dumb. Because I knew when I started I wasn't doing as much as I can. Those work-outs always involve a movement (or movements) that I'm not good at. I don't know anyone that likes to do things they aren't good at. And I've wondered lately if I've been using my need to scale as an excuse to slack on those movements.

It wasn't so much wondering, as realizing what I was doing. When I started, I was scaling because I couldn't do the movements in a reasonable time. Three months later, I'm leaps and bounds stronger and more capable, but I'm still scaling the same.

My biggest excuse: I don't want to finish last.

Gave up that excuse at the beginning of the week.

Wow, Crossfit has kicked my ass this week!

And I've finished last Thursday. I fought for every second of that time! I finished pretty damn proud of myself.

Friday, I had my turn to kick some ass. I didn't manage the WOD Rx (work-out of the day as prescribed (without scaling)). But I did it at the higher level. And I managed to do one of the skills unbroken (meaning without rest) at a higher weight than I've used before. Which is a great accomplishment.

From now on, my new rule for myself will be not to scale just to not finish last. If I don't want to finish last, then I just need to work harder. And if I do finish last, I'm going to make sure that I've worked hard enough that I'm proud of finishing last.

Because finishing last is better than not finishing at all.

Don't give up on me

I'm still around. I'm still going to the gym. I'm still working on my diet. I was sick recently and it's thrown my schedule for a loop. But I'll be back soon with more posts. :)

Hitting the Weigh Loss Wall

Why is it if you indulge over a weekend you can put on 5 or more lbs, but if you eat clean for a whole week you might not even lose 1?

I am proud of where I am right now as far as working towards my goals goes. I love my gym and my coaches. I'm eating pretty clean. I'm not perfect. Sometimes I don't plan. But even then I eat the lesser of the evils option. And I'm pretty happy with the choices I've made.

Still the weight is not melting off like butter, like it has in the past. This whole losing baby weight is a kick in the pants.

I should say I've lost just over 20 lbs since having my baby. Most came off really fast, as having the baby is usually 10-15 lbs of weight right away. Then there was Christmas, where I didn't bother to try to watch what I ate so much. So really, where I'm counting from is January. Since January, I've lost 10 lbs.

I'm not winning the Biggest Loser at this rate. *sigh*

I need a plan.

I'm trying hard to not get too disappointed. After all, I'm trying to get healthy not necessarily skinny. It isn't a race. I'm not actually competing in the Biggest Loser. Plus, I've been overweight for years. It isn't realistic to think I'll just not be after a few months of work.

Man, I wish it worked that way though.

Back to my plan... I don't have one. Anyone have ideas?

I think I'm going to have to give up and start weighing food and counting calories. I'm nursing so that has to be factored in when picking a target range. And I'm going to have to write everything down. Keeping a food journal is the best way to find the flaw in the system.

So if you are like me and have hit a bit of a wall, maybe it's time to start a food journal too. There are a lot of online resources where you can type in your food amounts and it'll count the calories for you. And some will give you carb and fat totals as well. Or you can go the old fashion route and just write it down on paper. Having it there to reference will let you know exactly how many times a week you've been eating fast food, or skipping the veggies. It's very revealing.

I'm a little nervous I'm going to find out that I'm not eating as clean as I think, which I'm guessing is the case.

Open Letter to Athletic Apparel Manufactures

To the people in the design and development department:

I just wanted to let you know, I really like your clothes. They look cute. The new sweat wicking technology sounds awesome. All the 'keep cool' designs seem really impressive. I just have one problem. None of it fits. You see, I'm a bigger girl trying to get fit. I'm not alone. I'm guessing by your lack of product created to fit us, you've forgotten about us. I just want you to know we are out here, wanting to shed our hot, baggy men's sweat pants and t-shirts. We'd like to wear the 'keep cool' tops in bright women's colors, and the compression pants that are made for our body types. We have the money to spend if you'd just help us out. I don't feel like I'm asking a lot with that request.

But while I'm at it, I have another. It'd be great if you'd follow the same vanity sizings that the rest of the clothes making industries use. I say this because it's very defeating when I go to put on the XL shirt and it's more like a medium. All my other shirts say XL, it's something I've come to accept (but only for now). As you see, I've been working hard for months to change that to an L. But when I try on your XL super cute sweat wicking semi-fitted tops, I feel like a giant cow. And I'm pretty sure it creates lumps that I don't have otherwise. Not good. Women have a very emotional tie to their clothing size and having to go up breaks our hearts. And sad girls are less like to work-out. They certainly aren't going to be buying your clothes. And I want to work-out. I like it. It feels good. If you could design some clothes to go with my getting fit spirit, I would appreciate it.

So please, think of the big girls. We are working hard to get into your awesome fit girl apparel, but it'd be nice to have something to wear before we get there besides men's sweat pants.

<3 F'N Strong